Friday, March 14, 2008

Home base

I have been feeling a restlessness in my soul that I initially attributed to being snowed under with work reports. Those are done now, yet the quiver in my spirit does not die down. I catch myself snapping at my children, with undertones of resentment from having to set aside my long list of to dos to simply play with them. I have spent less time sitting with and enjoying the company of my husband....

I've strayed so far from home base.

This base cushioned with gratitude and the knowing that I live out a sacred calling to mother with strength and vision, and to be an uplifting partner to my husband - I now take slow, purposeful steps back there. This base is at the feet of my Father, and my life becomes inexorably off-kilter and muddled without dwelling there.

Brennan Manning said, “The dominant characteristic of an authentic spiritual life is the gratitude that flows from trust—not only for all the gifts that I receive from God, but gratitude for all the suffering. Because in that purifying experience, suffering has often been the shortest path to intimacy with God.”

There have been some painful times. And there have been exceedingly good times. Trusting that my life will be used and directed exactly as it needs to be, I find the joyous tune in my heart again. It's the same tune I sang when each of my children were born, when my husband and I exchanged our vows to each other.

This is the song of my home base, and it's coming back.


Ann said...

Absolutely beautiful and oh so true!

Daniel said...

Hey Noona,

Very moving post. It seems like Spring is a time of renewal. I also have gotten more intimate with the Heavenly Father and it is wonderful! With the renewal of the spirit came His blessings. My father and I have seem to have gotten a little bit closer. He seems to trust me more and gives me more respect. That is all I can really ask for.

Things are going well for me (I'm planning on emailing the clan very soon). I'm getting the impression you won't be able to, but are you still planning on visiting in April? I know my dad and I would LOVE (note that it is in CAPS, so I mean it!) to see your family. Let me know!

God bless, Noona,

ScrappyGuy said...

Heather, I deal with children (21 of them to be exact) and understand your frustration. Thanks for the reality check. Hopefully I can take your lead and find my homebase again!

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